Own your Brilliance...
And Stop Playing Small
My friend, Tolu, is one of the fiercest people I know.
She’s a no-nonsense woman, a ruthless executor, and the real definition of talk and do. One of those people whose courage rubs off on you just by standing close.
She was also one of the earliest volunteers at my nonprofit, CAWSTEM.
Back in 2019, we stumbled on a speaking opportunity for a women’s conference.
At the time, I was the resident content writer for our weekly newsletter, #CAWSTEMWeekly.
My instinct was simple: share it in the newsletter, then sign up to attend as a participant.
But Tolu looked at me and insisted we sign up as speakers.
At first, I found twelve reasons why I wasn’t qualified. I was new to public speaking, unsure of myself, and fully convinced that other, more “experienced” people should get the spot.
I applied anyway.
Two days later, we both received our speaker confirmations.
Ladies and gentlemen… that moment officially kicked off my public speaking journey.
Since then, I’ve spoken at more events than I can count.
And that experience taught me something I wish more people understood:
Choosing Courage over Safety
For a long time in my career, I played small.
I’d see an opportunity and whisper to myself:
“I don’t think I can do this.”
“Someone else is probably better.”
“Maybe next year.”
I know this rhythm too well.
And if I’m being honest, I still catch myself doing it sometimes.
But over time, I’ve learned that:
Courage is a choice - and it’s rarely comfortable.
You cannot step into the next version of yourself without breaking the container you’ve currently put yourself in.
So how do you start owning your brilliance?
How do you start showing up for yourself in moments that count? How do you break that “safe” container.
Four Things That Help You Start Owning Your Brilliance.
1. Do a Personal SWOT Analysis
Not the corporate kind - yours.
Most people skip this - but the clarity changes everything.
Knowing and analyzing your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats forces you to stop second-guessing and start seeing yourself clearly.
Your strengths remind you of who you already are.
Your weaknesses help you identify what you can grow, delegate, or manage.
Your opportunities show you where to stretch.
Your threats show you what’s standing in your way.
Back in Feb, I wrote a detailed post about how to properly do a SWOT analysis. Check it out here:
2. Ask for Feedback
Many times, we downplay feedback because we assume people are “just being nice or being mean.”
But people often see your brilliance (or lack thereof) long before you do.
Back in 2016/2017, when I worked as a PMO on a project with FBN Capital, I asked a couple of people to write me LinkedIn recommendations before I left for my MBA.
One of those is this feedback from Olawuyi.
At the time, I didn’t think much of it.
But years later, after writing this newsletter consistently, building a community, and using my skills to build, scale businesses, coach, and lead teams… I realized:
Olawuyi was right.
I am that girl!
Feedback is data. Ask for it. Use it to guide your next steps.
3. Friends Like Tolu
Everyone needs a Tolu.
A friend who sees something in you and refuses to let you minimize yourself.
A friend who pushes you into rooms you wouldn’t have entered alone.
And honestly, you don’t need many - one is enough.
Because having someone who challenges you, stretches you, and doesn’t accept your self-doubt at face value?
Game-changing.
Find your Tolu, or be a Tolu to someone.
4. Taking the First Small, Scary Step
Every big promotion in my career started with one tiny step I wasn’t fully ready for but I did anyway.
Clarity comes from moving.
Confidence comes from doing.
Momentum comes from starting.
And honestly, the next level of your life doesn’t require perfection.
It requires courage.
Courage is choosing the step in front of you, not the staircase.
So if you’re looking to be more courageous, say after me:
I’m done playing small.
And I’m only just getting started.
Stop convincing yourself that you’re not ready or worthy until you become some future, more perfect version of yourself.
You deserve more now.
Own your brilliance.
Quick Reminder: AMA Spots Are CLOSED
The response to my upcoming AMA has been overwhelming - all spots are officially filled (thank you!)
I even opened up 5 extra spots, and those disappeared quickly too.
If you secured a seat, you’re in for treat. Can’t wait to see you inside the live AMA workshop on Saturday.
If you missed out, don’t worry. This isn’t your last chance to ask your burning questions and get the clarity you’ve been searching for - it’s just the last AMA for this year.
But trust me… 2026 is already shaping up to be quite the lineup.
Keep your eyes on this space.
Want more support now? Here are two more ways I can help:
1:1 Career Coaching – Ready to make your next career move but not sure where to start? Book a career transition coaching session and get the clarity, strategy, and confidence you need to make your next move - without the overwhelm. I’m still taking one-on-one clients. Apply for coaching.
Personal SWOT Workbook – Not ready for coaching? Start here. Use my self-paced workbook (trusted by 300+ professionals) to assess your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats - so you can make smarter moves and stop guessing your next step. Download the workbook.
Till next week,
Keep growing 💜