Turning 33 Taught Me to Stay in My Lane

and stop trying so hard.....

My 20s were a lot.

First job. Living alone for the first time. Crazy relationships. Friendships that fuelled and broke me. My MBA. Questioning my faith. Finding myself over and over again.

Some of it felt like chaos.
Some of it felt like progress.
But I know all of it shaped me.

Yet for some reason, I stayed stuck in that season - especially around age 25 to 27.

I have this weird photographic memory, so I remember random details and it made it hard to fully shake off some of those years even as I grew older. The uncertainty of the future. The pressure to be more.

Stuck in that version of me, I carried that need to prove myself - to stay relevant, to measure up.

When I started sharing online more seriously in 2023/2024, I kept striving, chasing relevance, performing - trying to keep up with other creators (people with different priorities, different time and energy, different stories) instead of learning, integrating, and showing up in my own way.

And in that striving, I started to forget who I was.

Then earlier this year, I watched Cars 3 with my toddler (I know - stay with me).

There’s this scene where Lightning McQueen is trying to keep up with newer, faster racers. He trains like them, competes with them, almost burns out trying to prove he still belongs.

But in the end, he realizes - he doesn’t need to be them. He needs to do him. There’s still space for him on the track, just not the way he thought.

That scene shifted everything for me.

I realized I had been trying too hard and started learning how to stay in my lane.

I turned 33 in May, and that did something for my soul.
It’s quieted the noise.

I’ve started building from the inside out, not the outside in.
The occasional viral moments feel nice, sure.

But I’m less concerned about chasing virality, relevance, or showmanship.
I’m more focused on alignment, rhythm and flow.

More than ever, I’m leaning into the things I know I’m here to do -
Coaching. Teaching. Writing. Building. Managing people with care.

If my work impacts just one person - that’s still enough.
It always has been.

So this is me deciding to bloom where I’ve been placed.
To stay in my lane, and run it well.

A reflection for you this week:

Where are you chasing relevance instead of alignment?

What would it look like to drop the pressure and trust your lane again?

Want to go deeper on this? Check out my website to see how I can help you.

Note to Self:

Find yourself and don’t let him/her go.